There’s something odd about the dating scene, which is confusing and stressful. I guess I’ve been out of the loop for a long while, but now that I’m back “in there” I just get a general sense of “meh”.
Maybe because I’m older and I don’t quite have the same energy to stay up all night and be able to show up to work looking fresh as a daisy. I enjoy my creature comforts, like a squishy bed, a devoted cat, and my small circle of friends. I treasure my leisure time and very much view it as relaxation time. I work such wacky hours that when I do get together with others I want to make the most of it and truly enjoy myself. Maybe I’ve lost patience – maybe I have become the quintessential crotchety old woman. Who knows.
This general feeling of malaise is stemming from my experiences with PoF. I’ve yet to meet someone who I can connect to in any meaningful fashion – and it doesn’t necessarily have to be for dating/relationship purposes. Friendships as well have not quite sprung up. I have met some lovely people who I consider friendly and lovely acquaintenances – and hope to one day move them from the “acquaintenance” category to “friend”.
In the meanwhile, I was emailing with a young fellow from PoF for a short while and we met at the beginning of this week. And I am sure he will eventually meet someone who suits him well, and be the “man” of someone else’s dreams. There was a general sense of “meh” – plus the fact that I was not exactly impressed with his housekeeping skills.
I guess part of the problem with online dating is that when one connects via email with someone, there is this whole slew of emails flying back and forth and a certain comfort level is established, because it is – at the end of the day – fairly safe and anonymous. But once the physical meeting occurs there is a certain level of akwardness that did not exist during the emailing phase.
I have decided that I will stick with PoF, but mostly to form friendships and the discussion forums. I have no hopes of finding anyone via that website, for a relationship. I shall do this the old fashioned way – I shall try to tap my contacts (parents, brother, friends etc.) and see if I can meet anyone that way. I have a lunch with my mum on Sunday to discuss a few potentials within the Toronto Lithuanian community. I already know these individuals, we did hangout for a while a few years ago, I know their parents, they know my parents, each set of parents know each other. And there is a certain level of commonalities – heritage, interests, socio-economics, beliefs.