Opinionated Bean

I blogged a while ago about men and their pits and how I wished they would explore the wonders and delights of antiperspirant. I still hold to the idea that a good sense of hygiene is all that one really needs to not stink up the place, so to speak.

So now I go from men flapping their unwanted stinky man-stench to ladies and their need to drown in scent. I can never win - either it’s man stench or the latest in cheap knockoffs of Obsession or Chanel No.5. A slight scent is liveable and acceptable. Putting enough on that everyone can smell you 10 metres away is unacceptable; especially so if there is more than one wench in the general vicinity.

Whatever happened to a good shower in the morning? Does one need perfume anymore? In the past it was used to cover up the fact that people rarely bathed. But in today’s shower/bath obsessed western culture I would think that perfume & cologne has lost its usefulness — unless one uses it in their seduction arsenal. But I must say, if it’s for seducing me, I get instantly turned off by too much stench — whether it’s due to too much sweat or too much fake scent.

People should just enjoy their loofah sponges and become proficient with them.

While leaving the office today I took note of a gentleman who’s hair was a very striking shade of red - a cross between burgundy & flame with a dash of violet. At first I thought he may have been dipping into the Clairol or L’oreal hair colouring products - usually used by women; older men still tend to use Grecian Hair Forumla.

What I did discover when I passed him by was that he was wearing a very bad weave. He could be bald due to medical reasons, such as cancer therapy or having alapecia. But he had his eyebrows, there were hairs hanging out of his nose, so I assumed that he was just ashamed of his baldness.

Why can’t men celebrate their baldness. Relish it, enjoy it. All you really have to do, other than wipe it down is to put some sunscreen on so that it doesn’t burn. No more need for shampoo and hair conditioner.

Celebrate your baldness!!!

I just had a nasty experience on an elevator today - a stinky man was next to me, wafting his pits about, airing them out because he was schvitzing. I know it’s fairly warm today in Toronto, everyone knows that, so why this gentleman couldn’t have the decency to put on some antiperspirant or deodorant is beyond my comprehension.

I don’t relish my olfactory senses being assaulted by “man stench”. I was stuck on this elevator going up to the 18th floor while he was fanning his pits near me. I nearly gagged and made it obvious, I believe, that I didn’t appreciate this and moved to the other side of the elevator; and I did the typical Canadian thing, I glared but stayed mute.

I implore all men out there - wear your blasted antiperspirant, or I’ll smack you.